Her name is Kim DeLong. She‘s now living in Windham, Maine with my husband of four and a half years. Our marriage was perfectly fine until she came into the picture. She being any woman of morals she would have BACKED THE FUCK OFF knowing he was married with a family. So to make a long story short, my husband up and left my 2 year old daughter and I in September 2012. I was shocked and didn’t see it coming!! I went to her place of employment knowing she was working, and she wouldn’t even come out to see me when I got there. I wasn’t going to cause a scene, just wanted her to look me in the eye, and KNOW that she just ruined a family and hope that she was happy with herself and could sleep at night. She waited until my husband left me, to break up with and kick her boyfriend out of her apartment, and THEN moved my husband in. Dumb bitch, let’s just ruin a family and move in with a total stranger who treated you like shit 11 years ago and expect it to work? Well, she doesn’t know shit. Four years with my husband he cheated on me four times talking sexually with women AND MEN online and wanting to meet up with them and has NEVER been faithful with ANY woman ( I stayed for our daughter-he also did this with this with his first wife(she told me) and other girlfriends). Point being, he is my husband! If he can leave his wife, kids and responsibilities, he WILL LEAVE YOU! YOU ARE NO EXCEPTION! He does all the same things with her as he did with me in the beginning. I’m pleased knowing that my husband downgraded! Ha ha! || Dear Kim, || Why don’t you respect yourself enough to respect my marriage or my family? I get it, you want a man of your own, and you crave love in your life. That’s fine. What isn’t fine, however, is that you seek this love in a man that’s already found it with someone else. It’s no secret that marriage is work. This means the woman who is devoted to the man wearing the wedding band that you’re so eagerly enticing has been working very hard on the job and your actions could result in her losing all that she’s worked to obtain. What’s that? It takes two? Of course it does; and I say shame on the men who fall into your trap too. A man who loves and cherishes his wife for all the right reasons should see that no good will come from engaging in an indiscretion with you. You say you’re in search of “real love” and a “good man”, but what on earth makes you think that a man who would step out on his own family to play pretend with you is actually worth your time? And exactly how do you expect to sleep at night once he’s “yours”? Self-love is the key that opens the door to so many wonderful things in life. Working overtime to open a door that’s not for you to walk through will almost ensure that there’s no prize behind it, but rather unimaginable heartache and pain. You say there’s a shortage of good men in this world. Is that so? Well, if that’s true, how is the solution to that possibly forever tainting one of the few who still remain? Seems like desperate and reckless behavior to me. Are those the kinds of values you want to build a relationship on? You shouldn’t. I know a lot of you tell yourselves that if he chooses to be with you then he must have made “the better choice”, but I just don’t see it that way. I see a man who chose the easy route and a woman with values as poor as his own; a man who will most likely one day leave you too. (You’re fooling yourself if you think he won’t.) That’s no man I’d want to choose; so why do you? Oh wait, is it because you “can love him better”? Or because you “do all the things she just won’t”, right? It may be time to ask yourself if all the “things” you do that he likes so much are those becoming of a real woman or lady. You see him doing right by the woman he cherishes and you tell yourself those are the qualities that make up the kind of man you’ve always wanted to have for yourself. Yet, you don’t count disloyalty as a negative? Where’s the logic there? Look, I want you to be happy too, I do. But I’m here to tell you that you won’t find any joy in ruining another woman’s marriage. Here are some thoughts I recommend you ponder in that moment: Will you be able to live with yourself when you see another woman’s life fall apart because you selfishly tried to improve your own at her expense? Do you think you can build a happy home right on top of a broken one? Why don’t you love yourself enough to recognize that you deserve a healthy, happy, relationships untarnished by grief and guilt from day one? We hear often that we should treat others as we hope to be treated. This applies to how you meet your man ladies. Steal him once, and he’ll be stolen again. When that happens, you’ll want to write your own angry letter, I promise you. Oh, and one last thing. For those of you who feel you have a “true connection” with a married man and he feels the same for you – wait! If he’s the right man and he’s truly unhappy in his marriage, he’ll end things properly, on his terms, and without your interference. Then he’ll cool his heels until it’s once again the right time to pursue new love with you. That’s how it should go. Encouraging or asking him to choose your happiness over his family’s pain is foolish, and he’s an even bigger fool if he takes you up on it. || The VOWS my husband and I have are STILL ACTIVE. || Sincerely, || Your boyfriend’s wife.