So, my husband and I got married 10 months ago, been together a total of 8 years. Yesterday he left his emails open and I found many, many emails to this girl, Lizzie, asking to meetup and chatting about sex. He gave her a cross-streets and instructions what to wear. These messages go back months, and are sent back and forth many times a day. || I looked in his bag, found a throwaway phone. Texts from this girl, asking about our address, about our home, if I have the slightest clue about them, and of course sex and how much she loves him. || I confronted him. He says most of it was”fantasy” but he did meet this girl since we have been married. He said her texts about how she loved having sex with him was”fantasy”. Says she never was in our home… He just met her on the corner to give her rent money and talk because she”needed help”. || I feel like that is bullshit. Why did she use past tense about the sex (2 times) then? Why is he paying her? || We went to counseling, but it devolved into him blaming me for not fulfilling his”needs”. He became verbally abusive every day. He had his sister come stay with us to talk to me about staying with him. Both of them seemed to think that this is”just something couples go through” and it would make us stronger. || But in the end, I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t forgive him, and I saw a side of him in those emails I can’t forget. || I’ve filed to divorce. I ended up finding out so much more as to the extent of his cheating – including accessing all his emails to and from this girl who considered him her”boyfriend”. She told him he needed to leave me and that she’s obviously better fit for him and all of this other stuff, that I just couldn’t believe! And he was agreeing with her! She’s staying with him at this moment, and honestly I just don’t even care anymore. She can put up with him now. || So, I am living in a much smaller apartment far away. But I am happy, and free, for the first time in many years.